Our girl Peggy sure has been through a lot these past three seasons of Mad Men.  I find more and more somehow that her trajectory and mine have met in this crazy middle area.  What can we gather from all this?   Let’s break it down (Caution: this breakdown contains spoilers for Seasons 1 & 2– but honestly, why the hell haven’t you seen this show yet?):

1. Pete Campbell is an irretrievable asshole

Ok, so you’re some old money, status-obsessed, sexist, racist, brown-nosing backstabbing cheating piece of shit who is so fucking self-involved/self-important that you can’t even throw a fucking bone (not THAT bone, because clearly, that bone has been thrown) to the girl you got pregnant on a whim one night?  FUCK. YOU.  So, yeah, um, don’t date Pete Campbell-esque characters or trust shady ass judgemental gynocologists.

2. Don’t Hit on your Boss…even if he IS Don Draper

I mean, it might be physically impossible for me to not tackle Don Draper, if he ever existed, but in general, it’s totally not a good idea to hit on your boss.  Even if it gets you laid and gets you some advancement in your job, ultimately, you’re not going to like where that shit takes you.  You’re either going to get fired, ruin people’s lives, get emotionally manipulated, and/or feel guilty for the rest of your life.

3.  Don’t listen to Joan…even though she is very, very sexy

I mean, don’t listen to her at least when if comes to job/love advice.  Peggy got promoted, and Joan got fucking raped.   And by her sociopathic doctor fiance, no less, whom, as it turns out in Season 3, isn’t even a competent doctor.  That’s pretty much all there is to it.

4. Sleep with someone younger just for shits & giggles

Though you don’t have to act like an Ann Margaret-25-year-old-acting-like-a-14-year-old to do it, but generally, more often than not, it’s a totally fantastic idea to go to a bar, pick up a younger, hot dude and have a one-night stand on your own terms.  Mention that you work on Madison Avenue if he wants to find you.

5.  “There are other things we can do”

How stoked were you when this came out of her mouth?  I think I might have choked on my drink a little when Peggy said that to college dude.  GET IT GURL!

6. Every once in a while, see what hanging with the boys is like and beat them at their own productivity/creativity game.

While all the boys are mentally masturbating and trying to out-macho/out-cool each other, fucking stay late at work and get creative, and get ahead of the game.  Don’t worry about that old lady secretary scolding you, you’re in a very good place right now.

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Tags: dating, Don Draper, Joan Holloway, Mad Men, Peggy Olson, sex, TV, work