Broke-Ass Porn: Roseanne Style Secrets

Once a week we present Broke-Ass Porn.  It’s visually stimulating material for the financially impaired.  If this shit doesn’t get you going, you’re not as broke as you thought:

Some shows are known for their style as much as their stories. Sex & the City endorsed ballerina skirts for grown women, Mad Men brought back polyester, and Roseanne epitomized the highs and lows of 90’s fashion. Watching the show back then, I was too young to realize how innovative it was in dealing with alternative themes like alcoholism, the working class, and introducing gay characters. It didn’t feel “different”, but reminded me of many families  and friends I actually knew. Hard-hitting television aside, I watched the shit out of those re-runs well into college and enjoyed every “fashionable” moment along the way. So of course I realized I had found a kindred spirit when I came across the tumbler, Third and Delaware, an style homage to every episode of Roseanne!

Named after the intersection of the fictional town of Lanford, Illinois where the show takes place, this site lovingly captures every out-there ensemble the wardrobe department could dream up. Not only is there pages and pages of flannel eye-candy, but hilarious descriptions to go with every post. From breakdowns of DJ’s penchant for denim vests, to Nancy’s a.k.a Sandra Bernhard’s body-conscious onesies. Every screen capture instantly brings back memories of the dysfunctional roller coaster ride that was the Conner Family.

The small screen was not the only place, Roseanne brought her own brand of pure sass to the public. This “She Who Must Be Obeyed” sweatshirt reminds me of a little movie called “She Devil“. The dream-team ensemble of Rosanne and Meryl Strep makes for one memorable chick-revenge flick. Did you know it was even nominated for a Golden Globe? Man they don’t make’ em like they used to.

Another perk of the show, was it’s never-ending stream of cameos. One minute you’re watching Becky get knocked up, the next minute freaking Loretta Lynn strolls onto the set. Other pop-up appearances included Joan Collins as Roseanne’s cousin, Fabio as a dream sequence, the ladies of Absolutely Fabulous bring their special brand of trash talk to the show, and of course, Chris Farley doing his “fat guy in a little coat” routine.

While I have a special place in my heart for all the characters, I think hands down, Nancy got to wear all the batshit crazy outfits. She was a real trendsetter on the show and pulled off asymmetrical hair look like no one else. A proud bisexual, Nancy never misses an opportunity to show off the goods. How else is she gonna snag a fox like Morgan Fairchild?