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Why Nextdoor is a NIMBY Hellscape

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In the past few years I’ve become increasingly thrifty, not just for financial purposes, but environmental ones as well. In order to find the things I needed, I’d utilize craigslist and Facebook marketplace, but every now and then I’d open NextDoor.  I listed my parents’ address on Nextdoor since they live in well-to-do Lamorinda to find better loot. However, every time I open the NextDoor app, I’m reminded that NIMBYs have made it a digital hellscape.

However, every time I open the NextDoor app, I’m reminded that NIMBYs have made it a digital hellscape.

NextDoor operates as your modern day classifieds– similar to craigslist, but it differs by listing every user’s name and neighborhood and limits findings to a certain radius from where you live. Think of craigslist meets Facebook. It also provides added security, as you must verify your address by entering a code they send to your home address. This way, you know who’s who by where they are located so it becomes less intimidating for a terribly uncoordinated 5’3” girl such as myself to drive to some Joe Schmoe’s house to pick up a lightly used aquarium from a neighborhood 15 minutes away from the nearest freeway entrance.

Even though I think their time would be better spent doing pool aerobics and trying out new low-sodium recipes to maintain their blood pressure; their opinions about everything, and their complaints about how a Safeway cashier accidentally overcharged them for cranberry juice pollute the NextDoor feed.

My biggest issue with ND, however, is that the site is overrun with disconnected boomers who share their concerns about how the times are a-changin’ and how uncomfortable they are with those changes. Even though I think their time would be better spent doing pool aerobics and trying out new low-sodium recipes to maintain their blood pressure; their opinions about everything, and their complaints about how a Safeway cashier accidentally overcharged them for cranberry juice pollute the NextDoor feed.

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The shittiest thing about being a millennial (especially coming from successful parents) is the fact that you’re surrounded by these rich geriatric fucks who are far less educated than they pretend to be and absolutely clueless about the crumbling world around them, yet have the most resources to make the necessary changes. These boomers were brought up during a surging economy, voted in Satan (Reagan), and internalized archaic Judeo-Christian ideals that lead them to believe that God made earth just for them to exasperate all its resources and leave the deteriorating, overheating mess of a floating space ball for future generations to deal with. It sucks. If you want to know why the world is on fire, log into Nextdoor.

Here are some examples of the incredibly hot takes you’ll find on NextDoor, rated by how annoying I find them:

Refreshing but Angering: Lady just wrote about her educational post being removed a THIRD TIME about on which indigenous lands we live. This time she included a time stamp and a video of her now censored post which she tagged #IndigineousCensorship. I bet you my firstborn child that you have the cause of censorship in following posts.

Exactly What I Thought I’d See On Here: Man complaining about an organized shoplifting heist of a large retailer in a nearby city, advocating for “law and order” 

Exactly What I Thought I’d See On Here: Another man posting about the mass looting in the area, mentioned George Floyd protests causing this phenomenon. Fear Mongering boomers noted in the comment section.

WTF: Woman finds a second noose tied up in a public park in the East Berkeley Hills and pleads for the perpetrators to stop, telling them it isn’t funny and that she may ask police to patrol the area.

Average Post: Lady complaining about her water bill being too damn high. (To be fair, she right. All the bills are too damn high)

Average Post: Man complaining about rising gas prices being too damn high, insinuates Biden is to blame.

Average Post: Lady asking why the air quality has too damn shitty lately, wonders why

Average Post: NIMBY opposing Berkeley having a Ferry at the Marina, urging all Berkeley residents to attend a town hall meeting to oppose 

Average Post: Some guy suspects UPS driver possibly stealing (UPS employees are union workers, so that’s doubtful)

Ok, this one’s lit: Some guy asking why sideshows aren’t legal, and if they could be organized in unoccupied shipyards in Oakland. Would probably make them safer too, I’d assume?

Average post: Ring video of a mountain lion walking through someone’s yard at night in Fairview next to a CANYON, as if regional mountain lion habitats didn’t precede human development. Do these people know where they live? 

I’m with OP: Took a picture of some asshole who parked halfway in between a normal parking space and a handicap spot (they do not have a placard), didn’t even blur the license plate. Good for you for shaming them, OP. Good for you.

I don’t think I have to share more examples to get my point across. I’m not really picking and choosing either, I just scroll down and shared the often fear mongering boomers posting about how people ‘from the wrong side of town’ (or in this case, the Caldecott Tunnel) are causing mayhem and dragging their property values down, telling each other to “be careful” because things don’t feel as safe as they used to. These people need to get out more and spend more time in the surrounding areas to become conscious of the income inequality that is synonymous with the Bay Area. Hopefully they can get a view of the big picture instead of bitching to their neighbors on Nextdoor that people from “other cities” are scary. Maybe then they would see that they have to become more proactive about solving these issues in the long term instead of advocating for further segregation. 

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7 Comments

  1. Amy Diab
    December 14, 2021 at 9:17 am — Reply

    NextDoor is like Facebook for Karens and Homeowners

  2. April Weeks
    December 14, 2021 at 10:31 am — Reply

    If you think NextDoor is bad, try the comments section of Claycord.com. Makes me despair for humanity.

  3. Brian
    December 14, 2021 at 11:03 pm — Reply

    Like any public forum, you cannot control the content or the contributors. That said, I have gained valuable hyper local information which in my opinion outweighs the noise of petty or unjustly opinionated neighbors (as outlined in accurate detail above).

  4. concerned
    December 15, 2021 at 9:28 am — Reply

    So disappointed that you published this kind of ageist rant, Broke Ass Stu. The divisive and reductive “boomer vs millennial” and vice versa is simplistic, emotionally driven and overused. Stoking generational divides is the last goddamn thing we need right now. And nope, I’m not a Boomer, nor a Millenial nor a parent of one. Nextdoor is a dumpster fire, check. This guest writer has talent but how about applying it towards topics more worthy? Deep dive some statistics or history about the generation you seem to revile. It’s a lot more complicated than you realize, and you’re about to lose a cubic butt load of rights that were secured by activist Boomers (among others).

  5. saraphim33
    December 16, 2021 at 12:34 pm — Reply

    As a Gen X’er (therefore filled with ennui and, dysphoria), I love perusing NextDoor. It’s a constant source of online entertainment. From complaints about; 1. People from the wrong side of town 2. The mentally ill 3. The houseless population and what to do with “all those lazy druggies” 4. Lost pets 5. Pets being eaten by coyotes 6. Wild animal sightings (gasp) 7. Ugly houses disrupting home values 8. The neighbor’s barking dog- I could go on, but you already know. NextDoor is an online bacchanal of complaint induced bliss. Why would anyone ever speak to a neighbor when they can broadcast it to the whole neighborhood? The whole thing is genius. I hope it never goes away, if only to remind me that “people like that” really do exist IRL. And they probably live next door.

  6. Alice Mosley
    December 16, 2021 at 2:45 pm — Reply

    Who are you calling “NIMBYs?
    It’s in fact the so-called YIMBYs who are advocating for “ALL” types of housing. SF already has an excess number of luxury condos. Developers already have more permits than they’re using. But every time they’re given the green light for more, it drives up the cost of the land – making it harder to get affordable housing. Just paying a fee that goes into the mayor’s pot of housing money guarantees NOTHING. The small percentage of “below market rate” housing promised is a drop in the bucket.
    What we need is twofold:
    Social Housing, which in Europe is widely available to low and middle income residents, which a wealthy city like San Francisco can underwrite (if we had a more imaginative mayor); and
    Buying up existing buildings to prevent them from leaving the rental market (to create yet more luxury condos), leading to evictions of local residents. Voters already approved a measure a few years ago (prop I?) to help invest in providing housing.
    How about preventing more homelessness, by helping folks to stay in their homes?? That’s not NIMBYism, but common sense!!

  7. Doug
    December 17, 2021 at 7:21 pm — Reply

    This has got to be one of the most ageist articles I’ve ever read in San Francisco.

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