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Upcoming Storm Could Produce Wettest Day In San Francisco History

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If these recent weather patterns continue, San Francisco is going to go from being the ‘City by the Bay’ to being the city under the Bay. 

Saturday’s atmospheric river brought a thunderstorm that ranked as the second wettest day in San Francisco history And, if reports are to be believed, the atmospheric river positioned to soak the Bay Area starting this Wednesday could surpass it to become the wettest day ever in San Francisco. Pretty fuckin’ crazy, right?

The problem is California isn’t set up for heavy rainfall. Everything from our infrastructure to our drivers become completely useless when the sky starts pissing. 

I know that people from other parts of the US are gonna start rolling their eyes as they read this, but we’re used to good weather. This is a big deal to us. We’re the shake and bake state, not the float like a boat state. 

That was catchy, wasn’t it? I’m a great writer. You should follow me. Lol.

Anyway, the main point of this article, other than making you chuckle, is to get you prepared. If you’re reading this on Tuesday, 1/3/2023, the date of publication, go to the store and get a few days worth of supplies, just in case. They’re predicting floods, power outages, and landslides, so we should take this seriously.

An infrastructure-disabling storm coupled with a serious earthquake could be a massive problem.

Get some flashlights, candles, some canned food, maybe a surfboard and a jet ski, just make sure you have what you need because shit (water) is gonna hit the fan (the Bay Area) hard this week. 

And this warning isn’t only for San Franciscans or Bay Area people, but for everyone in Northern California, especially those around the North Coast or up in the mountains. You guys already get hella rain, and it looks like you’re about to get hella HELLA rain, so you should be hella HELLA prepared. 

Double hella is dead serious. Everyone in NorCal knows that. 

Jokes aside, this could get bad. Buffalo, NY regularly has snow and the city of Buffalo has seen its fair share of blizzards, so when officials in New York  told locals about the severity of the coming storm, some people kind of ignored it. 40 lives were lost and it was nothing to scoff at. 

Do I think this is going to be as bad as Buffalo’s blizzard? No. But I don’t think we should fuck around. On top of these (almost) record breaking storm cycles, we’re dealing with an uptick in seismic activity. Earthquake clusters have been pummeling the North Coast/Humboldt County area the last couple weeks and we’re just as susceptible to earthquakes as anyone else on the Pacific Ocean. 

An infrastructure-disabling storm coupled with a serious earthquake could be a massive problem. So… ‘ya know… Prepare. Just in case. 

This is likely the beginning of severe weather incidents for The Bay Area. Climate Change is. The summers are gonna get way hotter than usual and the winters are gonna leave us dry or completely drown us. 

And this time it looks like we’re being drowned. 

Prepare. If nothing happens, nothing happens. But be smart, Bay Area. 






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Abraham Woodliff - Bay Area Memelord

Abraham Woodliff - Bay Area Memelord

Abraham Woodliff is an Oakland-based writer, editor and digital content creator known for Bay Area Memes, a local meme page that has amassed nearly 200k followers. His work has appeared in SFGATE, The Bold Italic and of course, His book of short stories, personal essays and poetry entitled Don't Drown on Dry Ground is available now!