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The Niners & Cowboys Playoff Game Will Be Epic

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This Sunday at 3:30 pst the fallen from grace, self proclaimed America’s Team, Dallas Cowboys make their way to Santa Clara to take on one of the best 49er teams I have seen since the 90’s. I know, a bold statement. Arguable at best. Maybe I’m just getting caught up in the nostalgia of the “Catch” of the 80’s. The Troy Aikman led cowboys of the 90’s. The running joke based on hall of famer Michael Irvin, “Why do the Cowboys play on a dirt field, because they smoked all the grass and snorted all the lines.” We will never forget TO’s mid star celebration. Something Jesus himself would be proud of.

The story will be about who is this Purdy kid? How can he hold up against a strong front seven with Micah Parsons lurking around. Next to the Chiefs this might be the toughest matchup Kyle Shanahan has had to game plan for all season. We know how that Chiefs game went.

This is a different team though. CMC is clicking on all cylinders and has found his place in the offense. Probably the best mid season acquisition in the history of the NFL. Debo is healthy, Diggs will be locked on Aiyuk who I feel will give the 49ers the advantage.

The problem lies with quarterbacks who extend plays. Dak Prescott can do that. While I love the Niners secondary, it does have holes that can be exposed. Let’s hope pick city shows up. This defense is extraordinary. Led by, who in my opinion, should be up for MVP and a lock to be defensive player of the year, Nick Bosa.

Ticket prices for this game are through the roof. Last check on the app, Gametime had nosebleeds between 4-500 and lower seats over 1000 a pop. I hope the suits can bring the noise. If the Chase center has shown us anything, rich people like beer and yelling as much as us priced out regulars. Hopefully they stay off their nanny cams long enough to take pride in the decades long tradition that is Cowboys and Niners playoff football. Lessss Go!!!!!

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JC Carlston

JC Carlston

JC is a freelance writer of untypical nonsense and former co-owner and founder of Lower Branch (art blog/nomadic curating group) and the Lower Branch Gallery in San Francisco's Tenderloin district. A sports nerd with an appetite for all things art and absurd. He can easily be found bopping around all corners of the city with a beer and burrito in hand, keep an eye out and say hello.


  1. I like croquet as a sport
    January 22, 2023 at 10:59 pm — Reply

    It will be a veritable CTE fest! I cannot wait for these future shotgun mouthwash users to bash each other’s brains in!

  2. Rico
    January 23, 2023 at 2:42 pm — Reply

    Cowboys got crushed and flooded Santa Clara with their tears! Nothing better than beating those punks. Jerry Jones crying made me smile.

    • Use your brains, not your melon
      January 25, 2023 at 4:54 am — Reply

      This sport will be banned and it will be made illegal. no amount of concussion protocols in place will prevent these morons from wanting to kill themselves or make their wives like Nicole Brown Simpson.

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