Donald Trump Visited Pacific Heights To Beg Big Tech For Money

Donald Trump – Photo Credit: Gage Skidmore

Do you ever feel like we’re living in Hell? Do you ever get that certain sensation that accompanies the consumption of news that makes you feel like you’re perpetually burning alive? Maybe it’s just me, but this is one of those stories. Donald Trump, the orange man with the spray tan who has made a career out of shitting on places like San Francisco, is not too big to grovel at the altar of big tech for a campaign contribution. 

David Sacks, one of the original investors in PayPal, decided it would be a fun idea to host a fundraiser for Donald Trump at his Pac Heights mansion. Pacific Heights is the campaign contribution capital of San Francisco. It’s colloquially called ‘Billionaires’ Row’ and it features a number of big ass homes with views of the Golden Gate Strait and the overrated bridge that crosses it. I’m not trolling, the Carquinez Bridge is a way prettier Bay Area bridge, and it’s not plagued by selfie-stick-wielding tourists. So I’m right, fuck off.

When asked what the worst neighborhood in San Francisco is, people often point to the Tenderloin, Bayview-Hunters Point, or Visitacion Valley, but those parts of the city aren’t the source of the ills that plague them. Pac Heights and places like it, are at the core of the cancer that kills us all. I’m not saying that because it’s a wealthy neighborhood, I’m saying that because in Pacific Heights you have a cluster of incredibly affluent individuals with their own agendas, collectively organizing events to bribe the very people who are sworn into a position of authority to act on behalf of the American people. 

And Pac Heights isn’t very fuckin’ reflective of the American people, is it? 

While I would love to place the blame squarely on the shoulders of Donald Trump, this is also true of Democrats. Joe Biden and Kamala Harris frequently show their faces in Pacific Heights looking for handouts. It’s disgusting and disingenuous of both the Democrats and Republicans. The Democrats are supposed to be the woke, urban, LGBTQIA “we love everyone” party. So why go to San Francisco’s wealthiest neighborhoods? Why doesn’t Joe and Kamala pop up in a normal neighborhood in Oakland? Not the Oakland Hills. Average-ass Oakland. I want to see Kamala Harris go to San Antonio Park and recite her favorite 2Pac lyrics. She did say he was the greatest rapper alive after all. 

And since Trump apparently loves the blue collar white trash types, why the fuck is he in Pac Heights then? Get this Man to Rodeo right away! Not Rodeo Drive, Rodeo, California. I want to see this fucking guy hold a fundraiser at Flippy’s Cafe surrounded by enough refinery workers, general contractors and meth dealers, you’d think Kid Rock and Joel Osteen just announced a free concert called something stupid like the Bawitdagod Tour. I want it to be an abomination.

In all honesty though, that wouldn’t be an abomination at all. Either one of those things would actually be kind of beautiful. Because whether it’s a Democrat in an urban area or a Republican in a forgotten blue collar suburb, it would be representational democracy. Which is something we say we have, but we really don’t. 

The true abomination is that we allow ourselves to live in a world where our supposed leaders are nothing more than door-to-door salesmen, begging the least among us, who for some reason, have the most, to feed them the scraps from their tables, so the beggars masquerading as leaders can be adequately positioned to give the people who already have everything even more. 

Pacific Heights isn’t a ghetto. But it is San Francisco’s worst neighborhood because it’s worse than a ghetto. It’s the inventor of ghettos. It’s a deadbeat dad using child support money to buy favors from psychopaths. It’s the camel trying to pass through the eye of the needle. It’s a pretty place for ugly people. It’s a hell that looks like Heaven.

It’s Pacific Heights. And it’s our fault. Also Donald Trump left San Francisco with 12 million dollars.

Christ.

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