by Broke-Ass Stuart     For all those who’ve been keeping up on the whole ruining of Bay to Breakers ordeal, I’ve got some interesting news.  The Citizens for the Preservation of Bay to Breakers, a group of which I’m on the committee, has decided to hold a press conference on the

  by Broke-Ass Stuart     I rarel’‹y give my full endor’‹semen’‹t to a music’‹ group’‹.’‹ Sure I may help promo’‹te a frien’‹d’’‹s thing’‹ every’‹ once in awhil’‹e,’‹ but it’s not often’‹ that I’m willi’‹ng to throw’‹ my weigh’‹t behin’‹d somet’‹hing and give it my full seal of appro’‹val.’‹ That

  It’s the day after and cupid has shit in his diaper and cigarette breath.  I, on the other hand, have jalepeno tequila on my breath and haven’t defecated – too much cheese at the  house party in Bushwick.  It was manageably “festive” – a guy drew a picture of

    Instead of sitting at home and masturbating with your tears while thinking about your ex, why don’t you go out and do something for Valentine’s Day’s this year?  No, I don’t mean surprising said ex and begging them to take you back, I mean doing something completely different than you did

      Do you ever feel like you’re just one pint of chunky monkey away from uttering ‘œwake me up when I’m a size five?’  Are you afraid of cheapening your relationship with your significant other by falling into the traps laid out for you by the Valentines Day

    New York, New York, big city of dreams…ugh…shit ain’t so pretty these days is it?  With the economy residing in Poopsville, more and more people are getting the “it’s not you, it’s me” speech from their employers.  Yes, pink slips are raining down on New York like a

  Going to free stand up comedy shows is like trying to swallow pills made for horses: sometimes it goes well, other times it just doesn’t and you want to die.  About a year ago I went to a small standup show in a backroom the size of a refrigerator

  Last night I went a FREE big air contest sponsored by Red Bull and almost paid 10 toes.  It was the coldest I’d been in my life.  My parents insistence on making me uncool in high school with hats and gloves came to mind as I looked at all