In honor of the San Francisco Chocolate Factory closing I figured I’d share this funny write up I did of it in Broke-Ass Stuart’s Guide to Living Cheaply in San Francisco: Don’t get your hopes up. There’s no eccentric and snarky candy millionaire running around with a platoon of orange faced musical

Ok, so you really fucked up this time. Not only did you forget your anniversary, which also happens to fall on her birthday (which you also forgot), but you didn’t close the front door all the way which allowed her cat to run out and get hit by a car.

Update for 2016: This originally appeared in my SF book. While North Beach has changed for the better, and my attitude with it, my opinion of Sam’s is still the same. I love that place! I’m posting this today in honor of the passing of Mile “Pops” Shawa, the owner of

photo from buzzine From the outside this spot has a total biker bar look to it, but once you get in you realize that it is more of a “55 year olds getting drunk and dancing to live blues music” sort of spot.  This fabled watering hole is one of

Back before the turn of the 20th century most of the Richmond was taken up by cemeteries. A 1901 law made it illegal to bury the dead in city limits and in the 30’s all the graves were relocated to Colma, where they now remain.  The Columbarium, built in 1897,

A friend of mine, who works as a cook at a nice restaurant on Pier 39, once told me that a hamburger at his job cost $16. My immediate reaction was, “SIXTEEN DOLLARS! You better at least get a reach-around with your $16 hamburger!” After I explained in Spanish what

Someone built these crazy concrete slides in the most random place in the Castro. Basically you grab a piece of cardboard at the bottom of the slides, then go up to the top, and slide down. Not exactly rocket science, at least I don’t think so (I really don’t know

Jumpin Java is a great place to get work done. They’ve got free wi-fi, mellow background music and more electric outlets than a marijuana grow room. In fact, since my girlfriend lived near when I was writing my SF book (and I was homeless and staying with her), I wrote