Dozens of Whales Spotted ‘Synchronized Swimming’ in SF Bay
April 1, 2024 – Dozens of Humpback whales were spotted breaching simultaneously in the San Francisco Bay this morning, to surprise and joy of many onlookers.
“This year has been excellent in whale sightings,” said whale-watching Captain Roger Spermbale, “but I’ve never seen this many Humpbacks swimming and jumping like this in unison,” he continued, “it’s almost like it’s choreographed.”
Years ago, a lengthier day-long boar ride to the Farallon Islands would be needed to cross paths with the majestic marine mammals, but now on April first, you can see hundreds of whales breaching all over the San Francisco Bay.
It’s not just the whale tourism industry making these observations. The Marine Mammal Center in Sausalito has observed this kind of water ballet being conducted with this particular pod of whales before.
Roger Daltrey, a whale biologist, and theater critic explained what is behind the whales’ appearances. “As sea surface temperatures rise, in-shore populations of fish like anchovies seem to increase,” said Daltrey.
That’s one of the reasons marine biologists say Humpback whale sightings closer to shore are happening in recent years.
Daltrey continued, “The whales will follow that food source in. In years when water is colder, their alternate prey, which is krill, seems to increase offshore in those colder waters,” said Daltrey. “And this paticular pod also really likes performing to an audience.”
“It never gets old seeing whales perform, no matter how many I see, but this particular routine, playing out in the San Francisco Bay is pretty special,” said Daltrey.
Daltrey explained that the Whale Pod’s leader is a “veteran of the Whale ballet circuit”, which runs from the tip of South America all the way to the shores of Alaska.
“This whale pod’s leader is a an incredible performer.” – Cpt. Spermbale
Local art observer and curmudgeon Alex Mak was characteristically unenthused, he said, “I caught their morning show, and I have to say it was uninspired, just ‘meh’, it was a lot cooler in the 90s.”
But many other locals and tourists alike could not believe their eyes and began chumming the waters for autographs and selfies.
This article is satire and does not reflect facts or any real reporting, and the photography is ai generated nonsense, on account of it being APRIL FOOLS DAY!