“No guarantees,” said Deputy Chief Ken Craig throughout the evening. “You won’t know how you’re going to respond until it happens.” The ominous disclaimer hushed the room as one by one, we placed ourselves at the center of a worst-case scenario. What would you do if, on a night out

Last week on “Your Home Bar,” we outlined your basic liquor necessities to begin mixin’ drinks at home like a pro. So by now, you’re probably staring blankly at your bottles of Rumple Minze, Baileys, and Everclear, wondering, “What on earth do I do now?” Two options: 1) SHOTS (what

As 2024 winds down, we’re reflecting on another incredible year of sharing the stories, art, culture, and nightlife that make the Bay Area so unique. BrokeAssStuart.com wouldn’t be what it is without you—our community of readers, supporters, and believers in independent media. This year, instead of asking you to join Patreon

I’m shocked no one has talked about this yet, but it’s high time we discussed drinking at home in more depth. Getting hammered in bars is all well and good, especially if you can get someone else to buy your drinks. But then you always end up owing somebody something.

I don’t like to toot my own horn, but I’m a little bit of a DIY maven—not as much in the way of crafting as in salon services, home decor, and bicycle maintenance. This means I’ve tried enough crap myself to know when it’s not worth it or even just

I haven’t gone grocery shopping in a while, mainly because I can’t afford it. The other day, I decided I should eat some food. I make a habit of keeping a lot of ingredients that won’t go bad on hand: dry beans, veggie broth powder, uncooked rice. I also looked through

During my stint as an unemployed person, I, perhaps stupidly, signed up for Netflix after years of holding out. I was an old-school Netflix user, back when the company’s offerings were strictly limited to DVDs by mail. But in my shrewd poverty, I chose to eliminate that service when I

Sore throat, congestion, a cough that sounds dangerously whooping, and more phlegm than you can shake a stick at comprise my current state of existence. I’ve basically been dying since Monday, but I’m using all my energy to emerge from a mountain of used tissues and Halls wrappers and help those

Hey, broke asses, I have some bad news. This is the last time I’ll write The Unemployment Chronicles—FOR NOW. A writer and editor by trade, I also enjoy waiting tables, and that’s what I landed a job doing this week. Is it furthering my career? Not really, but it is