Win A Weekend in the Hamptons
Q: What does a Broke-Ass need more than anything?
A: A vacation.
Q: And what is a destination that no Broke-Ass can afford?
A: The Hamptons.
Ah, The Hamptons: The crème-de-la-crème of exclusive beach destinations. The place where celebrities such as Christie Brinkley, Nathan Lane and Mr. & Mrs. J-Lo go to sun themselves and “rub elbows” (what a strange expression) with one another. Now all Broke-Asses have a chance to win a free weekend in the Hamptons from the luxury sun care line, Hampton Sun.
If I won that contest I would try my hardest to “rub elbows” (something!) with Sean ‘P-Diddy’ Combs. If I did, I think it would go something like this'
Christine: Yo, Sean Jean, Puff Daddy, P-Diddy, Combs, how are you? I really like your clean, crisp, white suit…. and your giant…mansion.
[Christine grabs one glass of champagne from a server…thinks about it, then grabs another]
P. Diddy: Hey C-bag. Thank you so much for accepting my invitation. It has been years now that I have been trying to get you to come here. You are looking amazing. Did you lose weight? It must seem that way because you are sporting a beautiful, deep, dark, tan. However, something is different about you. It must be that your skin doesn’t seem leathery like these Long Island whores I hang out with all day long.
C: Yes, you are right! I keep my skin supple and soft with Hampton Sun’s skincare/suncare line. I use the sunless-tanner to give me this glow and I block the harmful rays of the sun with their line of sunscreens. They moisturize and protect like no other brand. Oh, and they make your skin smell good too.
P: Really? I can’t smell it.
C: Move a little closer.
P: Can’t smell it.
C: Closer.
P: Can’t smell it.
C: Closer.
P: Can’t smell it.
C: Closer.
P: Can’t-
C: CLOSER!
The End.
Ok well, as you can see in that amazing bit of playwrighting '“ Hampton Sun’s products are just the best. They truly are. And now you can win a weekend in the Hamptons (P. Diddy and his party not included) by going to www.hamptonsuncare.com and registering.
Next week: A dialogue with Edie Bouvier Beale of Grey Gardens.