Shopping, Style and Beauty

Fall Coats: A Guide

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There’s a rotting cornucopia gourd’s worth of reasons why fall is the best season (except for spring, early summer,  Christmas and my birthday). But, if you’re like me, it means you have a vagina, and if you have a vagina it means you like clothes.  This means that your favorite kind of harvest bounty comes in the lush fabrics, beautiful stitching and inifinite layering possibilities of falls most delectable clothing options. (You’re supposed to read that last sentence in the voice of that mincing homosexual m’aitre d’ from The Simpsons). Best of all, of course, is coats.  Fall coats! Heavy enough to keep you warm while you’re walking cobblestoned streets, sipping pumpkin spice lattes, standing  beside a leaf pile or mourning the death or your college sweetheart.  But what KIND of coat?  So many styles, so many colors so many fabrics. It can be a tad overwhelming!  Here’s a helpful guide:


Collegiate, Oxfordian and irresistible to the Ryan O’Neills of the world, peacoats are classic, stylish and come in a variety of colors. We all know that camel is the look of the season but some like it gray, others red, but I say classic navy’s where you can’t go wrong.


Kill a civilian! Nothing says harvest time like ritual slaughter. Do Columbus proud the chic way in one of these battle-worthy toppers.

Military Cape
$450 –
Military coat »

First Brass Coat
$80 –
Vintage coat »

Military Mac
45 GBP –
Military coat »


Perfect for subway exhibitionists and girls with an Anna Karina fixation alike.

Batwing Trench Coat
$234 –
Vintage coat »

Swing coat

For zany dinner parties, jaunts to the shops on Saturday morning and girls with a Laugh-In Fixation

Tweed swing coat Black
150 GBP –
Phase Eight coats »

Lapin Fur Laser Cut Swing Coat
$5,395 –
Cape coat »


For those of us who still occasionally do our onanistic homework to that one English / Humanities teacher/professor we high-school wanted to hook up with but would have hated  forever if he had actually ever come on to us. Corduroy is a plus. Elbow patches are a no, unless you plan on throwing  our textbooks out the window and putting your feet on the desk.  And even then, no.

Chaperoned Blazer
$128 –

Animal Print

For Fran Drescher.

leopard love coat
$178 –
French connection coats »

Gap Animal Print Jacket
$50 –

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BAS Writers

BAS Writers

BAS Writers is mostly a collection of articles written by people for the early days of this site. Back then nobody knew that snarky articles they were writing could come back and haunt them when job searching a decade later.

1 Comment

  1. Anna G - Caliburg Contributor
    October 20, 2010 at 4:20 pm

    But, Ashley, I just want to “rap” with you, and it will simply be impossible for me to tell you to forget everything you’ve ever learned until now without elbow patches. How can I get through to these KEEEDS?? Speaking of which, you forgot about fall coats for Edward Jams Olmos-style teachers. Chicanos out of water, if you will, like yours truly, who has just purchased her first olive green military hooded pseudo-rain jacket.