Five Texts that Need to Stay the HELL Out of My Inbox

Okay, okay,…maybe that’s a little bit harsh. BUT STILL! I’m freakin’ broke here, dude. You’re wasting my valuable text message space on something so stupid, so innocent, and so lame.

Please, do understand that I totally get when one-worders are necessary, but most of the time it’s unnecessary. My text messaging plan in conjunction with my budget doesn’t allow for that sort of non-sense. I just can’t afford it.

So here I am, asking you to please join me in banning the following texts:

1) “Bye!” , “Later!”, “Peace!” or any other simple answer to indicate the end of the conversation. Thanks for the courtesy remark, but really, you could have included that message in your previous text. It’s also likely that I would have already concluded the end of the conversation after noticing the long pause after the last text had been sent and received. It’s no big deal, I won’t be offended if you don’t say anything– the end of the conversation at that point is pretty much mutual.  Let’s just talk to each other next time we talk, kapeesh?

2) “K” , “OK”, . Um, yeah. I’m glad you understand…uh… can you at least fake it, and write a little something extra. Maybe you could show a little enthusiasm, i dont know!?

3) “LOL” , “Haha” It wasn’t that funny, huh? You didn’t think it was funny enough to express your appreciation for the hilarity. And it wasn’t enough to make you wanna make any sort of comment about it? That’s basically it? Just:  Ha-Ha ? … fine…hmmph.

4) “FML” or “OMG” For those of you upset about your bad day and feel the need to express it in a three-letter abbreviation, can you at least tell me what’s up? I mean F-My Life is a pretty strong statement. Let’s talk, maybe we can figure it out together. For those of you OMG-ing, OMG what?…Again, what happened? Please explain!

5) FORWARDS! OMG. (Yes, this is an OMG moment.) OMG I HATE THESE. Seriously, what the hell made you send me this annoying waste of text?! No one is going to come after you, and you won’t receive bad luck for seven years. Seriously…it’s just junk.

…not to mention money you are costing me!

Thanks friends. Please pass the message on…text it!

Photos courtesy of Miracle Morons Blog and Savage Chickens.

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