Why Slumber Parties Aren’t Just for Kids

Adult slumber parties are pretty much the best thing ever.  No, not those type of adult slumber parties– the slumber parties I’m talking about involve much more dorky jammies, and much less threat of unwanted pregnancy.  I’m talkin’ about old-school, “let’s do makeovers and watch Molly Ringwald movies and try to summon the dead” types of slumber parties– the kind that you went to in 5th grade and didn’t dare fall asleep, for fear that some bad seed would freeze your underpants.  But slumber parties are not just for the Hannah Montana demographic– gathering a group of your friends together for a good ol’ party in the home can be an excellent way of having some major fun without spending the big bucks.  I once hosted a grown-up sleepover with my friend Claudia, and it turned out to be “A Night to Remember,” and not in the Freshman Homecoming Dance 2001 kind of way.

One of the reasons that childhood slumber parties were fun was because you got to snoop around other people’s houses and sleep somewhere outside of your own bed.  After rolling out your hot pink sleeping bag in Ashley C.’s (or Brittany S.’s, or Jennifer W.’s, or whoever’s) parents’ living room, you snoozed beneath eerie pics of mustachioed late, great-aunts, and were privy to your friend’s parents’ arguments about their intimacy issues.  It was a social anthropological slice of someone else’s life– and everyone knows mild voyeurism is incredibly entertaining.  For mine and Claudia’s adult sleepover, we invited some of our friends to spend the night in the fine Craftsman-style bungalow of an old lady Claudia was house-sitting for (yeah, homegirl wasn’t the most profesh of house-sitters).  Drinking Flirtinis out of someone else’s cups while lounging amongst school photos of toothless grandchildren added a layer of creepy forbidden fun to our sleepover.  If you don’t have a friend who house-sits, you can also try sleeping in your backyard, on your rooftop, or anywhere else that’s a bit unconventional.

Dorky pajamas are another no-excuses requirement for adult slumber parties.  Think about what your adult self usually sleeps in– chances are it falls somewhere on the spectrum between “stretched out free t-shirt,” and “completely in the buff.”  But– no lies– don’t you kind of miss the days of your youth, the days of full-coverage p-jams in festive prints and colors?  Well, an adult slumber party is the perfect venue to break out your puppy-print flannel set, your Pajama Jeans, or your long underwear with the butt flap.  As long as it’s ill-fitting and/or brightly colored, it’ll work.  Just be careful– my friend Masaaki borrowed my favorite green sweatpants at my adult slumber party, and got so addicted to the dorky jammies lifestyle, that he decided to swipe them.  He now constantly taunts me by texting pictures of himself donning my beloved sweats (while doing things like: watching Japanese music videos on VHS, eating Velveeta, and mixing up a batch of Flirtinis-for-one).  Dorky jammies are a must for an adult slumber party, just don’t get too obsessed and fall into an agorophobic trap of daytime television and 24/7 elastic waistbands like Mr. M.

Of course, refreshments are a crucial part of any slumber party.  Keep it cheap and klassy-with-a-K by feeding your guests the dream diet of your childhood: candy, popcorn, and mac & cheese.  Wash these treats down with some adult beverages and some nostalgic teeny bopper music (BSB Millenium, hello!), and your guests should be feeling pretty magical.  But again, don’t let them get too carried away in their junk food highs– at my sleepover, Masaaki ended up passing out in my bed with a bowl of mac & cheese, the cheesy sauce oozing all over my sheets.  This happened shortly after he: 1) drank hella Flirtinis; 2) accidentally put Backstreet Boys’ “Larger Than Life” on repeat; 3) commented, “This is a really long song,” after the fifth consecutive play.  Next thing I knew, he was snoring in a peaceful, cheese-covered slumber.

Once you get your guests jammin’ in their dorky jammies and filled with junk food, you gotta entertain them.  I recommend a seance, tarot card reading, ghost storytelling, or some other spooky pastime.  One of my favorite sleepover memories from childhood was when my friends and I tried to “channel the spirits” of boys we had crushes on.  That’s right, we tried to channel the spirits of people who were (are) living to find out if they wanted to hold hands with us at recess or not.  Clearly we didn’t know the true point of a seance.  Similarly, one of my favorite sleepover memories from adulthood is when we all piled into that old lady’s attic to tell ghost stories, and Masaaki shined a flashlight in everyone’s faces while shouting “Hentai!”

Dorky jammies, dorky musical jams, nostalgic peanut butter and jam sandwiches, and jamming ten people into the attic to communicate with the dead– basically, adult slumber parties are my jam.  So next time you’re low on cash and want some big entertainment, invite a few friends over to your place and Baby Huey it up by reliving your youth via platonic sleepovers for grownups.  If a success, I guarantee lots of drunken dance contests, pillow fights, C-list movie watching, and mac & cheese between your sheets.  Unfortunately, the over-the-top Japanese house guest is not included (I’m lookin’ at you, Masaaki).

Photo credits: Visual Photos, me