Punch Line Assumes Mission Position For 1 Day Only
You heard right, San Francisco’s indelible Punch Line Comedy Club is opening it’s doors and receiving a load of degenerate albeit hilarious comics from The Mission Position on October 6th. Helping to lead the charge is comedian Jessica Sele, along with Matt Lieb, Torio Van Grol and several other funny people. Sele has the type of strange and comical mind we love at brokeassstuart.com. A delivery that is honest, self-deprecating, and full of allusions to sex, animals & feminism, Sele is definitely a comedian you should know. Comedy fans should checkout Mission Position’s special one night event Tuesday, October 6th at the legendary San Francisco Punch Line.
Name: Jessica Sele
Why San Francisco?
I was mesmerized the city when I visited in college. There were so many murals and queer babes and interesting comedy shows! I’m a little bummed by the whole “war on poor people” thing that is making it harder for San Francisco to stay radical, but I’ll just keep trying to pump some life into this city while I’m here. It’s a beautiful place.
What district do you claim?
Alamo Square. (Full House house baby! Let’s go get some artisanal toast! Go beat up Google Glass Lady at Molotov’s! Then go home to our rent controlled apartment with fleas and Clinton/Gore campaign posters!)
Do you ever bomb?
NOT TO BRAG, but in addition to winning one of Courting Comedy’s top five comedians in San Francisco this year, I also, more notably, tied for “best comedian while bombing” with Mark Smalls, Chris John, Cameron Vannini and Charles Hoffa Kelly. While I used to cry in the Brainwash bathroom after a bomb, I now enjoy it in the moment. I embrace the darkness of it, getting comedians in the back of the room to laugh with me, inducing fear in the audience, and then hopefully bringing everyone back up with me. In general, feeling a room full of people either hate you or be nervous for you, even for a minute, is weirdly fun if you make it! It’s feels like defying the universe.
Your weirdest night out in San Francisco?
Back in my drinking days, I got wasted in the financial district one night and ended up in a van with some guy who claimed to be a debt collector for the mob. He had huge wads of cash and a gun in the van. He took me to a pasta place in the middle of the night in Fisherman’s Wharf. He left me with my seafood linguine while he “worked” and I started crying and yelling at everyone in the restaurant because they didn’t understand or do anything about global poverty and war. The mobster came back, saw that I was a mess, and gave a cab driver a ton of money to drive me back to Oakland, where I lived at the time. I cried in the cab because nobody understood global issues, or me and also my boyfriend didn’t love me. Then the cab driver then told me that I was a genius for seeing what others could not and that love stands for “land of sorrow, ocean of tears, valley of death, end of life.” I replied, “I knowwww!”
So that was pretty weird. I don’t drink now.
What was your first job in the city?
I worked at the FYE at the mall in San Bruno because the manager there was somebody that I had bad drunk sex with from OkCupid in my college town. It was a nightmare.
Do you have a favorite 1 liner?
“Philosophers ask, ‘Can God make a rock so heavy that he himself can’t lift it?’ I like to ask the question, ‘Can God write a joke so subtle that even he himself can’t understand it?’ Then I realized that’s what life is. Life’s a joke we don’t get. Much like this one.” Natasha Muse
What’s your favorite joke in your set right now?
My manatee joke:
“I had a sex dream recently; in it I’m a manatee. But the weird part is that after we had sex, the other manatee took it’s fin, stroked my back and whispered in my ear, ‘we have the same scars.”
I performed it in front of a twelve year old kid at a show recently and he laughed really hard at my manatee impression. So, it’s fun for the whole family.
Who’s a performer you’re embarrassed to like?
I’m not embarrassed to like Weird Al, but I’m embarrassed that I’ve been sexually attracted to him my entire life.
Your Top 5 Comedians of all time?
Richard Pryor, Maria Bamford, Louis C.K., Jim Gaffigan, Tig Notaro
Have anything coming up?
October 6, Punch Line SF presents The Mission Position
October 16, Lessfunny at Lessspace in Oakland