The Biggest Critiques of My Campaign and My Responses

Pretend this is me responding to criticism. Photo from Ericka Cruz Guevarra/KQED

The internet is full of people who talk shit. Most of them have no sense of humor. I do, so these are my responses.

Critique: “What a fucking hipster”

My Response: I was a hipster way before it was cool, bro.

OMG! He’s such a hipster!

Critique: “Why haven’t you put out a platform yet?”

My Response: I actually have, I’m just not doing it all in one place or at one time. I’ve put out pieces about human poop, corruption, affordable housing, homelessness, legacy businesses, and of course more poop.  My campaign is about bringing this city’s real problems to light, the problems that city hall doesnt want you to talk about, the corruption that has taken control out of the hands of citizens and placed it in the hands of corporate interest and greedy politicians.

Critique: “He has no political experience. How can he be mayor?”

My Response: Having experience in crooked-ass SF politics should actually preclude you from being mayor. Plus, Ed Lee has been in politics for almost his entire career and look what great job he’s done.

The joke is on you San Francisco. Photo from Westside Observer

Critique: “I would never vote for someone who wears a fedora.”

My Response: I bet your grandfather wore a fedora and he was probably a badass.

Critique: “He uses too many foul words. People who swear that much shouldn’t be mayor”

My Response: Fuck you.

My 2nd Response:  If all you can hear is the “bad words” I’m saying then you’re paying attention to the wrong shit. It’s like I’m pointing to a meteor shower and you only focus on my finger.

Got anything else you wanna complain about? Leave it as a comment and maybe I’ll get around to responding after I’m done pulling back the green curtain and shedding light on what San Francisco’s government has become.

Billionaire investors like life long Republican Ron Conway have far too much influence on our city.  Developers and venture capitalists are making the real decisions at city hall and the results are displacement of the people who make San Francisco special.  Every day our city becomes less diverse, less creative, and more expensive.  Our homeless population grows, our artistic population shrinks and the wealth gap continues to expand to record levels.  These investors don’t care about our city, they care about making money.  And they will chop this city up and sell it to the highest bidder if we let Ed Lee continue to run things.  We implore you to Vote this November 3rd, and it doesn’t have to be for me, as long as it is for change.  Vote 1-2-3 and replace Ed Lee.

Awesome art by Aaron Duffy…that’s Ron Conway behind the curtain

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