When Tina Fey told Esquire, “I really believe, when [I first tried a Peter Pan doughnut], if I had a penis, I would put it in this doughnut. I finally understand what motivates you guys and what you’re thinking about,” that Tina and I were even more alike than just

I love sandwiches to an embarrassing extent. They are compact and deeply satisfying; making a great one requires an understanding of the delicate nature of balance and portion in food. Also, holy jesus, are they delicious. But sandwiches get a bad rap from time to time, especially when people try

As 2024 winds down, we’re reflecting on another incredible year of sharing the stories, art, culture, and nightlife that make the Bay Area so unique. BrokeAssStuart.com wouldn’t be what it is without you—our community of readers, supporters, and believers in independent media. This year, instead of asking you to join Patreon

Okay, guys, ready? One, Two, Three… “COLLECTIVE SIGH OF RELIEF.” So, you know how people who have lived here long enough to still call Hi-Fi the bar Brownies and remember when Tompkins Square Park was a shanty town (although it still kind of is… one homeless man once presented me

Thanks be to my coworker and her birthday girl demands; without her, I never would have heard of Chile Pies (& Ice Cream) and their milkshakes with pies blended into them. Chile Pies is the dessert store that’s in cahoots with and sits a block down from Green Chile Kitchen.

For fast food in a fancy atmosphere, there are two options: 1. Wait until Valentine’s Day when White Castle on Metropolitan covers their tables in with cloths and offers table service. 2. Go to Arby’s in downtown Brooklyn. It’s the exact same menu that’s been a staple of suburban high

Remember those Entertainment Books from back in the day that offered a textbook size worth of sweet deals? I was forced to peddle them to my unsuspecting neighbors for various school and sports team fundraisers, where treasures like “Buy 10 dinners at Olive Garden and get the next one free”,

The other day, something amazing happened. I wish it was that whoever stole my iPhone out of my purse turned out to really just be borrowing it to add more useful applications than “Cat Paint” and returned it to me all ready to go, but instead it was that I

Let’s face it, being broke means you don’t often entertain guests because nothing sucks more than trying to live on the cheap and ending up floating dinner for some freeloader. But I’ve recently realized that, if you play your cards right, you can host a reasonably exciting dinner party (I