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Be a Better Masturbator

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Ok, so let’s say you’re looking to do something cheap today but don’t feel like sitting on the hard bleachers at a $2 baseball game and don’t wanna watch movies with a bunch of people who are too cool to put brakes on their bicycles.

 

Perhaps you just feel like learning better ways to enjoy your own company.  And by that, I mean getting your jollies off.  And by getting your jollies off, I mean touching yourself in the hoo-hoo.  And by touching yourself in the hoo-hoo, I mean everybody’s favorite “-tion”, masturbation!  Hooray for playing with yourself!!!

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We at Broke-Ass Stuart’s Goddamn Website are very sex positive (despite a handful of negative experiences of course) and we believe that everyone deserves as many orgasms as possible, whether they be with a partner, some partners (we don’t judge), or self-inflicted.  That’s why we’re glad to inform you that this is National Masturbation Month and Good Vibrations is teaching workshops.  

 

As you may have guessed by now tonight’s workshop is all about pleasing yourself.  It’s called Masturbation with Intention: Expanding the Meaning of Self Pleasure.  For those of you who think it’s normal to cry after sex, this might be a good starting point for you.  The workshop is at GV’s Berkeley location and starts at 5:30 pm.    

 

The only really strange thing about all of this is that GV’s #1 new product is a Hello Kitty vibrator.  Then again who am I to judge which cartoon characters get you off? 

 

Good Vibrations

5:30-6:30 pm

2504 San Pablo Ave. @ Dwight Way

Berkeley, CA

510-841-8987

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Broke-Ass Stuart - Editor In Cheap

Broke-Ass Stuart - Editor In Cheap

Stuart Schuffman, aka Broke-Ass Stuart, is a travel writer, poet, TV host, activist, and general shit-stirrer. His website BrokeAssStuart.com is one of the most influential arts & culture sites in the San Francisco Bay Area and his freelance writing has been featured in Lonely Planet, Conde Nast Traveler, The Bold Italic, Geek.com and too many other outlets to remember. His weekly column, Broke-Ass City, appears every other Thursday in the San Francisco Examiner. Stuart’s writing has been translated into four languages. In 2011 Stuart created and hosted the travel show Young, Broke, and Beautiful on IFC and in 2015 he ran for Mayor of San Francisco and got nearly 20k votes.

He's been called "an Underground legend": SF Chronicle , "an SF cult hero": SF Bay Guardian, and "the chief of cheap": Time Out New York.

4 Comments

  1. random girl
    May 13, 2009 at 1:39 pm

    Wow, I love Hello Kitty and now I have an excuse to finally cave and buy a vibrator. Do they ship to New York? No really do they? I think owning a vibrator is the same as basically silly because most girls I know can get laid whenever we want to but this gives hello kitty a whole new meaning!

  2. random girl
    May 13, 2009 at 1:41 pm

    My sister slept with a guy who cried after sex. I think I should fly him out to that workshop.

  3. Broke-Ass Stuart - Editor In Cheap
    May 13, 2009 at 3:19 pm

    Wow really? That’s so fucked up on so many levels!

    as for the whole vibrator thing, I’m pretty sure they ship everywhere, so you should totally get one.

  4. random girl
    May 14, 2009 at 5:07 am

    Already ordered one on ebay billed as a “back massager” from a japanese seller. One person left a review that was just read “AAAHHHHHH Love it very powerful” so if you see a sharp decline in my comments in 5-7 business days you’ll know why:)