Broke-Ass Porn

Broke-Ass Porn: The $5,000 Bill

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Look at that sexy beast…wow.  Could you imagine holding this bill?  You’d be like, “Shit, man.  I’ve got $5,000 in my wallet.  Fuck buying a bacon wrapped hot dog, I can buy the whole cart and still have change left over to buy all the bootlegged DVDs on Mission Street!!”

There was a time, back before the interwebs, when banks used big bill denominations to transfer money between each other.  Instead of sending over tons of bags filled with $100 bills the US Mint printed up these fatty fuckers.  There was everything from a $500 bill up to a $100,000 bill.

What’s crazy is that these big bills were taken out of circulation back in 1969, which means that old Mr. Madison up there was actually worth about $29,000 last time he was used.  Imagine walking around with that in your pocket?  I’d feel nervous as shit.

Someone, I don’t remember who, told me a story that they were in line at the post office and a really old guy (like 90 years old) showed the person a $1000 bill that he had in his wallet.  To answer your question, no he didn’t beat up the old guy and take the money, although that would be a pretty good story.

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Broke-Ass Stuart - Editor In Cheap

Broke-Ass Stuart - Editor In Cheap

Stuart Schuffman, aka Broke-Ass Stuart, is a travel writer, poet, TV host, activist, and general shit-stirrer. His website BrokeAssStuart.com is one of the most influential arts & culture sites in the San Francisco Bay Area and his freelance writing has been featured in Lonely Planet, Conde Nast Traveler, The Bold Italic, Geek.com and too many other outlets to remember. His weekly column, Broke-Ass City, appears every other Thursday in the San Francisco Examiner. Stuart’s writing has been translated into four languages. In 2011 Stuart created and hosted the travel show Young, Broke, and Beautiful on IFC and in 2015 he ran for Mayor of San Francisco and got nearly 20k votes.

He's been called "an Underground legend": SF Chronicle, "an SF cult hero":SF Bay Guardian, and "the chief of cheap": Time Out New York.