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The Best Craigslist Missed Connection Ads from Bay to Breakers

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There’s nothing better than seeing the slow, costumed, trudge home that people make the morning after an event like Halloween or Bay to Breakers. Seeing a dude in a slutty banana outfit doing the walk of shame is priceless; truly one of the best man made spectacles on earth. But almost equally as epic are the Missed Connection ads that appear on Craigslist the next day. This year there doesn’t seem to be nearly as many as previous years, but there are certainly some gems. Below are my favorites. Feel free to leave your best B2B or Missed Connection story in the comments below:

Bay to Breakers: kissing booth with horse and rider – w4m – 34 (bay to breakers):

i was the airline captain mistaken for a stewardess.

you’re cute. cutest kissing booth by far.

id love a date

you dressed as Ryu! hot! – m4m – 29

i didn’t know i had a street fighter fetish until today. you were a tall, strapping lad with beautiful arms, glasses and some scruff, all dolled up as Ryu from street fighter. your costume was perfect and tattery and god dammit your chest looked fucking hot, just a little big of chest hair and so big and hard; your skin pale and radiant.

i was sitting on a tree stump and you walked behind me and my friend, away from the rest of the bay-to-breakers crowd. i pretty much locked on and cranked my neck around like a retarded owl trying to look at you as much as possible as you passed. and i couldn’t get up for a few minutes after you passed on account of the giant boner you induced.

i played out a little fantasy in my head where i walked over to you and asked if i could lick your chest and you responded “Shoryuken!” (which sounds like ‘sure you can’). anyway, puns are hot. you are hot. you are beautiful. i’d love to meet you some day and go all tatsumaki on your dick.

god you are gorgeous. i want to worship you. and, well, play fighting games with you, too. maybe whilst fucking. god, that’d be hot. yeah, brrrrrr, big time boners just thinking about you. if you read this, and want to hang out with a 29 year old, cynical, gamer nerd, gay dude, please message me! i’m happy to trade pictures before we meet.

The football hit you with mud bay to breakers – m4w (haight ashbury):

Ah you were pretty cute. Let me know if you want to hang out sometime.

Kat Women girl at bay to breakers – m4w – 2 (haight ashbury):

You looked somfreaking hot in the costume! You were by far the hottest girl out there today! I fell in love instantly!

Aw Crikey Steve Irwin! – B2B – w4m – 22 (Bay to Breakers):

You were dressed as Steve Irwin (and touting an Australian accent) at Bay to Breakers and were carrying around an inflatable crocodile that you would throw in front of unsuspecting crowds of people and wrassle with it. I was wearing pink plaid sunglasses and while walking through Golden Gate Park (near the rose garden) I asked to take a picture with you. We hugged each other tightly and took the picture. I told you I thought you were dead and you told me that you aren’t dead, but you make more money claiming to be dead. I have the picture as proof that you are indeed risen from the dead. You were hilarious and very good looking (even with the hideous blonde wig on). I looked for you again around the finish line, but there were too many people and I couldn’t spot you. Since the event was sponsored by craigslist, I thought I would give this a go and see if I could find you.

Bay To Breakers Golden Shower Stud – m4m:

Saw you being interviewed this morning on KRON 4 during the race. You are super hot with a great smile! Based on your costume for the race you are also someone who might take some risk or be spontaneous. I would love to meet for a chance to admire that smile up close. Maybe coffee or a drink sometime? I am a GWM, 49. Let’s talk.

Laura and Kelley, B2B, Piglets in Pink… – m4w – 37 (alamo square / nopa):

You two were dressed in pink, with piggy snouts and everything, and we chatted for a while. You moved here from St. Louis in January. I’m a great tour guide…I’d love to show you around! I immediatley started kicking myself for not getting your number.

B2B – Disco Shirt and Brown Shorts – you asked me to frisk you – w4m – 30 (USF / panhandle):

We met on Fell in the Panhandle. You were dancing with your friends and I swear I have a version of the shirt you were wearing in my closet. My friend and I were dressed a cops. I enjoyed giving you a pat down and I was sad to walk away. Doubtful you’ll ever see this but I can’t stop thinking about you. Here’s to hoping….


What’s your favorite B2B or Missed Connection story? Leave it as a comment below.

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Broke-Ass Stuart - Editor In Cheap

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Stuart Schuffman, aka Broke-Ass Stuart, is a travel writer, poet, TV host, activist, and general shit-stirrer. His website is one of the most influential arts & culture sites in the San Francisco Bay Area and his freelance writing has been featured in Lonely Planet, Conde Nast Traveler, The Bold Italic, and too many other outlets to remember. His weekly column, Broke-Ass City, appears every other Thursday in the San Francisco Examiner. Stuart’s writing has been translated into four languages. In 2011 Stuart created and hosted the travel show Young, Broke, and Beautiful on IFC and in 2015 he ran for Mayor of San Francisco and got nearly 20k votes.

He's been called "an Underground legend": SF Chronicle, "an SF cult hero":SF Bay Guardian, and "the chief of cheap": Time Out New York.