The Best Pseudo-Christmas Movies

There’s undoubtedly tons of great holiday classics to watch this time of year: Home Alone, The Grinch, Jingle All the Way (yeah that’s right), It’s a Wonderful Life,The Santa Clause, Miracle on 34th Street, A Very Harold and Kumar Christmas, etc. Albeit, how many times can you possibly watch those? A million is the answer!  

But sometimes, especially right after Thanksgiving, you might just not be in the full holiday spirit yet. These following flicks will gently ease you into Christmas more efficiently than Santa trying to squeeze himself down a chimney after a milk and cookies bender. Then again if Christmas isn’t really your thing, i.e. you’re just not at all in the mood, you actually want to chill during Netflix, pissing off your parents on family movie night is fun or you’re Jewish and having goyim friends over, these cinematic masterpieces will also do the trick.

Ghostbusters 2 – The only ghosts not being busted in one of the greatest sequels ever are the Ghosts of Christmas Past, Present and Yet to Come (future). GBII also doubles as a great NYE movie that if properly done you can sync up to the ball drop and save new york while kissing your friend’s girlfriend since you didn’t bring a date.

Die Hard 1&2 – Somehow John McClane is always getting his motherfucker yippee ki-yay’d right around Christmas. Whether it’s saving innocent employees from terrorists during their holiday party or saving a hijacked plane on its way home for Christmas, the first two Die Hards are an uzi full of Christmas bullets.

Batman Returns – Arguably one of the best Caped Crusader films, Batman and Robin being the best. With Tim Burton’s help again, the holiday decor in Gotham is sure to drive you almost as batty as people saying Christian Bale was a better Batman than Michael Keaton.

Gremlins – Yes, this is centered around a Christmas gift but it’s the most adorable Christmas gift that goes horribly wrong making it an atypical holiday joint. Plus you know you wanted a Mogwai as a kid until you found out they were more work than a dog. 

Lethal Weapon – Just like with your family there’s bound to be a fight on the front lawn that results with Uncle Martin scissor kicking Cousin Joshua into a tree of lights. Spoiler Gift: seeing Gary Busey choked out by pre-antisemitic Mel Gibson. 

Addams Family – Really it’s just the opening clip where carolers meat cauldron, but that’s enough to throw anybody off! Plus, who doesn’t like a good Mamushka after a few glasses of eggnog? (Pour one out for Raul Julia.)

Honorable Mentions:

Edward Scissorhands – Do you remember your first snow? Tim Burton does, and with how much he equally loves Halloween and Christmas, you can double down on the Johnny Depp classic for both holidays.

Just Friends – Hey it’s better than JTT in “I’ll Be Home for Christmas” but sorry Ryan Reynold’s does not take his shirt off in this one. You’re getting coal in your stocking for that letdown RR.

The Ref – Because the holidays could always use a little couples counseling and Denis Leary in his prime. That ‘asshole’ is a true gift to comedy.  

Most Harry Potter movies – There’s at least one Christmas clad scene in almost every HP flick. The Christmas dinner scene in the Grand Hall is so much more glorious than the jumper Mrs. Weasley gifted Harry.