Dems Win Both Georgia Senate Seats, GOP Loses Presidency, House, And Senate

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On the bright side of a day of deplorable violent MAGA shenanigans, today is the worst day of Mitch McConnell’s life.  We had a glimmer of hope the day after the November election, and then Stacey Abrams moved mountains, things looked good last night, and now it’s a done deal. Georgia Senate candidates Rev. Raphael Warnock and Jon Ossoff have won Senate seats in Tuesday’s Georgia runoff elections, giving Democrats control of the Presidency, House of Representatives, and now the Senate, successfully defeating Donald Trump and all sycophantic suckasses in Congress.

The big news here is not these Democrats’ wins. It’s the fact that Mitch McConnell has lost his gavel as the Senate Majority Leader. Rev. Warnock was declared the winner of his seat Tuesday night to become Georgia’s first ever Black senator, while Jon Ossoff was declared the winner  Wednesday afternoon become the first Jewish senator elected in a southern state since the 1880s.

All of the credit goes to Stacey Abrams, whose nonprofits Fair Fight and New Georgia Project registered record numbers of young people and voters of color to flip Georgia in the Presidential Election, and now in the Georgia runoffs too. Abrams was jobbed out of the 2018 governor’s election thanks to voter suppression, She is expected to run again in 2022.

After a long night of results-watching, the networks called Ossoff’s win at 1:30 p.m. Wednesday. They declared Rev. Warnock the winner shortly before 10 p.m. PT Tuesday night. If you’re like me, you stayed up almost all night monitoring the vote count… But only if you’re Kor-nasty!

Meanwhile on Fox News, people are having trouble accepting these results.

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Joe Kukura- Millionaire in Training

Joe Kukura- Millionaire in Training

Joe Kukura is a two-bit marketing writer who excels at the homoerotic double-entendre. He is training to run a full marathon completely drunk and high, and his work has appeared in the New York Times and Wall Street Journal on days when their editors made particularly curious decisions.