The Atmospheric River has a Twitter, & He’s Kind of a Dick
Meteorologists and local news channels have been pretty creative in labeling the recent storm systems in California. We’ve seen ‘bomb cyclone’, and even ‘pineapple express’, but it looks like the media has settled on “Atmospheric River” as the dominant label for these storms. Partly because of a certain parody twitter account.
The Twitter account called Bob The Atmospheric River or @AtmosphericBob is making headlines and apparently, Bob is kind of a dick.
Your cities are nothing to me, your roadways are meaningless, I use them as my toilet.
Also @Karlthefog is a little bitch. pic.twitter.com/f4ZwaCgqk4— Bob The Atmospheric River (@AtmosphericBob) January 12, 2023
Since Christmas, there have been roughly 8 different atmospheric rivers unloading onto California. Atmospheric rivers are narrow but intense filaments of deep tropical moisture stretching thousands of miles across the Pacific.
Rain totals of 10 to 20 inches with up to 200 inches of mountain snow, and winds approaching hurricane force have accompanied the series of storms for more than 2 weeks all over California.
I'm dropping a mixtape with @pineappleexpress this week. It's 1.6 trillion gallons of liquid hell, and a smattering of @ClimateChangeUS is bullshit. pic.twitter.com/Qocfaqs09l
— Bob The Atmospheric River (@AtmosphericBob) January 12, 2023
The atmospheric rivers were aimed at the coast like a series of meteorological slip and slides, and at least 17 deaths have been attributed to the onslaught, which has brought damaging floods, landslides, downed trees, and power outages. It has also brought a series of tweets for an atmospheric river named ‘Bob’ who is kind of a dick, and ironically a climate change denier? He also apparently hates @karlthefog. (a twitter account in San Francisco Bay Area who tweets as the local fog).
Weirdest days in SF weather history:
– The orange day (2020)
– The day it reached 106F (2017)
– Whatever this is— karl the fog (@KarlTheFog) January 10, 2023
Bob The Atmospheric River seems to have a bit of a god complex along with a need for adulation.
I have the power of a thousand storms. I decimate heaven and earth.
What can @karlthefog do? Move a grey fart over a bridge every couple days. pic.twitter.com/csTlQTHiH6— Bob The Atmospheric River (@AtmosphericBob) January 12, 2023
The state’s snow water equivalent — or the amount of water contained in the snow — was 226% of normal on Wednesday, marking a high for the date not seen in at least two decades.
.@Visit_LakeTahoe, you're welcome. @skiheavenly, you're welcome. @US50Chains get on your knees and praise me.
Because of my glory you have the powder required to attract more idiots to your mountains.
ALL HAIL @ATMOSPHERICBOB! I AM THE CHANGE! pic.twitter.com/kQXwzo0jWv— Bob The Atmospheric River (@AtmosphericBob) January 12, 2023
The last time snowpack neared such a high on Jan. 11 was in 2005, when it was 206% of normal, according to state data. There was more than 11ft of snow on the ground in Donner Pass on Wednesday.
What is even crazier is that there is far more atmospheric river rain in the forecast.
Stay dry out there, and if you’re bored with staying indoors, play some Bay Area Atmospheric Bingo with your friends.
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