Who Is At Fault In San Francisco’s Traffic Fatalities? Pedestrians Or Drivers?

San Francisco is a crowded place – we have cars, buses, Muni trains, those dudes wearing ski masks who ride dirt bikes in groups of three or more, and, last but not least, we have pedestrians, or for those of you who require plain-fucking-English: the people on the sidewalk. And the people on the sidewalk are doing pretty poorly because 2024 was the deadliest for pedestrians since 2016. 

The question that befuddles the mortal mind is: how? How the fuck are more people getting hit by cars on the streets of San Francisco when every publication tells me San Francisco is an empty shell of it former self due a combination of the pandemic, Chesa Boudin, and Elon Musk saying mean things on Twitter or X or whatever the fuck else he comes up with to give the tabloids a reason to talk about him. 

Aside from Musk’s pejorative musings about the city that Twitter formally called home, it is undeniable that more sidewalk dwellers are meeting death than in recent years. 

While city residents want the deaths to decrease, many think the City by the Bay will continue to have a significant pedestrian death toll because of… wait for it… Pedestrians. 

Pedestrians jaywalk, walk drunk or stoned. Nothing is going to stop those accidents,” said Richard Brandi, to the San Francisco Standard. 

While it can be agreed upon that pedestrians and cyclists carry some of the blame, can we also not suggest that the people driving around in potential death machines that weight thousands of pounds to maybe pay fucking attention? 

We must admit, while bipedal brainiacs that populate the city aren’t known for their stunning sense of awareness, can we also admit that San Franciscans, or Americans as a whole, regularly speed. Not only do they speed, they look at their phones and conduct risky traffic maneuvers to get around some of San Francisco’s traffic bottlenecks. 

There are also people that suggest jaywalking is actually safer than using crosswalks. While studies on this subject are admittedly scarce, there is evidence to suggest that this is true.

While police have an obligation to investigate the City’s traffic fatalities, and who’s at fault for them, we must admit, it can be incredibly hard to determine the true wrongdoer in these types of situations. Let’s say, for the same or example, there’s a guy who jaywalks, let’s call him Jaybraham Smchoodliff, and this Jaybraham Character is blasting music on his headphones because he doesn’t want anyone to fucking talk to him. And Mr. Schoodliff decides to jaywalk because as Drake said 10,000 cultural years ago “YOLO,” and decides to say “fuck that red light, I don’t see anyone coming, I’m about to do my best Aerosmith and RunDMC collab rendition and and walk this way.” Meanwhile Tina McTesla is looking at Instagram reels of cats or some shit, and she doesn’t see Mr. Schoodliff. Both of these people are simultaneously breaking traffic laws. Who’s more at fault? It’s hard to say.

The blame in this scenario would likely fall on the pedestrian as there are many cameras in San Francisco to capture this Jaybraham guy breaking the traffic laws. What about Tina? While Tina was truthfully on her phone, the fact that she was in a vehicle when she rammed her Elon Musk Mobile into Jaybraham sending that exceptionally large hypothetical human flying.

I believe this is the likelihood in most of these traffic fatalities. But no one really seems to have any answers other than that they’re up. 

What do you think? Also don’t fucking start with we need more Waymos, I swear to fucking God.

SUBSCRIBE TO MY SUBSTACK HERE

FOLLOW MY WRITING ON INSTAGRAM HERE

FOLLOW BAY AREA MEMES ON FACEBOOK HERE

FOLLOW BAY AREA MEMES ON INSTAGRAM HERE

PURCHASE MY BOOK HERE