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Is Elon Musk On Drugs?

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Writing about Elon Musk is interesting. He’s absolutely an international figure, and despite how much we loathe it, he’s a local in some sense of the word. Every stupid tweet, edgy meme and desperate plea for attention isn’t just another piece of billionaire news – for Bay Area residents, especially those in San Francisco, Elon Musk’s outbursts are the equivalent of your obscenely rich neighbor being an obnoxious asshole.

But if the insinuations behind a recent Wall Street Journal article are to be believed, there could be another culprit behind Musk’s antics: drugs. 

But why is that relevant? I personally don’t think there is anything wrong with taking drugs. I don’t personally take drugs, but that’s because I’m not rich enough for it to be sexy. Elon Musk’s true affliction, which the WSJ will never point to is this: lack of consequence afforded to him by his unfathomable wealth. 

The reason why Elon Musk acts the way he does is because he truly and fundamentally knows there will not be repercussions for his actions. He’s unburdened by scrutiny as it lacks the teeth to detriment him in any way other than pointless thinkpieces like the one I’m writing right now. 

Even the critique of Musk’s behavior expressed in the WSJ piece has very little to do with the actual ethics of his actions, but the potential negative effects it could produce financially for Tesla and SpaceX’s shareholders. If Elon Musk’s online activities and outbursts were financially benefiting these people, they’d be endorsing it. 

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The critiques expressed in this article are blatantly ignorant of SIlicon Valley and rich people in general. Rich people are always on drugs. You know why? Because they can be. You know where I’ve seen the most blatant drug consumption? Wealthy areas. They’re also coked up or on some psychedelic to find themselves. But when they meet their spirit shaman after their ayahuasca trip, they ask the shaman how they can be better investors or entrepreneurs; it’s always something dumb like that. This isn’t a big deal. It’s spiritualism in the era of late stage capitalism. Is it grotesque? Yes. But this is America. If you critically think for even a second you come to the conclusion that it’s all grotesque. And then you start hating everything and alienating yourself from others. Don’t do it. It’s a waste of life, even if it’s true. Trust me, I know. 

Drug users are a broad group of people that express themselves in a myriad of ways. The behavior that they exhibit is just a reflection of their basest impulses. As inhibitions reduce as a result of consumption, people under the influence are significantly less likely to give a fuck what you think about them, so if they’re Nazis or something, it’s not the substance, it’s they were so high they forgot to bring their mask to the party. 

Elon Musk doesn’t suck because he may take drugs. Elon Musk sucks because he sucks. The Wall Street Journal sucks too. But I’d suggest you read it from time to time because it’s America’s only true religious text. Everything else is symbolism for poor people to debate until they die and ultimately find out it was probably for the wrong reasons. Such is life. 

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Abraham Woodliff - Bay Area Memelord

Abraham Woodliff - Bay Area Memelord

Abraham Woodliff is an Oakland-based writer, editor and digital content creator known for Bay Area Memes, a local meme page that has amassed nearly 200k followers. His work has appeared in SFGATE, The Bold Italic and of course, BrokeAssStuart.com. His book of short stories, personal essays and poetry entitled Don't Drown on Dry Ground is available now!