The rules of Karen are simple yet versatile. Anyone can be Karen with the right attitude and haircut.

Without even thinking twice, I can confidently say the best thing I’ve experienced during the Coronavirus Quarantine has been watching Tiger King. Netflix describes it as “A zoo owner spirals out of control amid a cast of eccentric characters in this true murder-for-hire story from the underworld of big cat breeding.”

A new study shows that people who put on Public Displays of Affection are on the hot seat this week.  As scientists have proven that ‘PDA’, while annoying in a normal year, has become 47% more annoying during a pandemic. “Social distancing is a serious thing,”said scientist Dr. Sara Adans. 

Despite the government’s shelter in place order, directing citizens to stay at home unless they need to “PROVIDE OR RECEIVE CERTAIN ESSENTIAL SERVICES”.  People still seem to be taking walks in parks periodically, and still seem to be walking their dogs and exercise outside their homes. Local man Kenneth Buttress

It’s day eleventy-thousand of quarantine, and if you are like me, you’re starting to think about eating your pets.  Not because you have anything against your wife’s Pomeranian named ‘Penelope’, but because your government is asking you to shelter in place, and to conserve supplies, and you have mouths to

“God is telling me to give Trump the virus, I’m so ashamed!”

This week, some art activists papered BART cars with a satiracal ‘frontpage’, titled Trump Re-Elected by One Vote.  The unsanctioned ‘articles’ from the ‘Washington Toast‘, warn that a low voter turnout will lead to a Trump re-election, and perhaps the ‘death of Democracy’. On the bottom right corner of the

At approximately 830pm in Hayes Valley, some PG&E equipment caught fire underground.  The result was a blackout for neighborhoods on the surrounding power grid.  Upper and Lower Haight St, Hayes Valley, parts of the Castro, Western Addition, even the goddamn Ballet had to close down and cancel its performance. As